Showing posts with label Fiction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fiction. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Tonic for the Vodka soul

His name was Jake. He reached the bar wearing spiderwebs over his eyes, and a deep wrinkle in his forehead. Everything about him smelled like defeat and as I looked at him through the glasses, empty bottles and lonely hearts, I could tell he was having a day from hell. Two of my regulars were in that night. And drinking like there was no tomorrow. I felt bad for Mr. newbie, who was still clearly sober. He just sat there looking like a lost penny. With my 'this is nothing, I've seen worse' expression in my face, I stared into his eyes while I asked 'What would you like tonight?', in my attempt to find out with what it was he wanted to drown his sorrows in. 'Anything. Give me anything to stop the pain'. As these words escaped his mouth, I knew I needed more information to prepare the remedy. 'Only if you tell me where it hurts and who is resposible for the pain', I sentenced. He gave me a tiny smile, that made happy I was there that night and after much hesitation, Mr. Newbie started telling me about the agony hidden in his scars...

Her name was Rachel. She was perfect: smart, pretty, nice, good person.... We met when I went to visit the Grand Canyon. She was there, by herself, had driven eight hours from San Diego just to look at the inmensity of the Canyon. I was there by myself too, and everything just fell right into place. Her smile, my eyes, it was like we were built for each other, you know? Have you ever had that feeling you've known that person from long before you actually saw her for the first time? Anyway. We clicked. And talked. And kissed. It was like being in a friggin' movie. Just perfect.

'But...' I couldn't help but say.

But -he continued- when the trip was over, she said she wanted to come with me to New York. I invited her to trust her instincts and come, and so she did. Two weeks after she moved in, walking back home from work I take a glimpse of this beautiful woman on a bar. I could only see her back. It looked familiar. I see this person talking closely to a man, who's whispering something in her ear, and seconds later, kissing her neck. Something in my gut told me to keep staring. Something was wrong. She kissed him back. I went inside the bar. Walked past the man. Turned around. It was her. And here I am.

I tried not to give him the "pity look". Even though inside I wanted to hold him like a little boy and tell him the typical"everything is gonna be alright. There are plenty of fish in the sea". For some reason, though I've listened to hundreds of sad stories, I never get used to them and always feel bad for my customers. My friends. So I didn't give him the "pity look". Instead, I poured the remedy -vodka, tonic, and lime- inside a frosted glass. And told him the truth.

'Drink up, buttercup. It's the only thing that will get you through'.

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Just a kiss



It's been six days already, and I can still feel your arms around me. I can still hear you breathing next to me, and I can feel your hard pounding heart beating, just like mine is right now. Its amazing how you can make an instant seem everlasting. I know times are getting hard but please don't do this to me. One night could have been one week, if only you would answer my messages. Why spend such a magical night with me and then never come back? I can't help but wonder what went wrong.. for me everything just felt right. Your smooth lips against mine, reminding me of how lucky I was at the moment to be with someone as sweet as you. Now I doubt I was lucky. Unlucky is more like it. I don't know why I am even writing you this stupid email. ..

... after all, it was just a kiss.

delete.

Thursday, August 30, 2007

Heartbroken letter to a now unknown recipient


I'm not sure how long I’ve been feeling this way, but it seems that each day that passes is a day that I am even more tired of everything and everyone around me. I can’t seem to get used of all the noises in my apartment. Even my cat is fucking exhausting. I try breathing in and out, try remembering that there are much worse things in life. What’s wrong in mine, anyways? Is it work, the never ending days of solitude surrounded by shallow sexual encounters that make an effort to remind me how much I miss you and how much I wish I could be with you again. Hours seem so long lasting. They drown me inside in ways that you could never imagine. I try dreaming of you. Too bad it only makes it harder for me to let go. Its been 3 months since we last spoke. You had to leave, you had to leave New York and me. And while in this infinite abyss we wait for the day in which we can just escape.. to you. Oh what I would give to just throw it all away, quit my job, abandon my cat and my apartment, and just live a life full of intensity and passion. Just leave everything behind in an attempt to find you. To live with you, and become the couple we once were. I cant stand this storm inside me. The city seems to be deserted just by my hard pounding thoughts. Weird people run without stopping, behind my door is this intense universe that can’t seem to stop. Days seem gray. Everything seems mute while I cry because of stupid reasons that just make me angrier inside. Its weird but Im mad at myself for letting you leave me, even though you did not warn me or said goodbye. How could you do this to me? After all we’ve been through. You told me how you don't like goodbyes. I get that. I really do. But after spending 4 years by my side, couldn’t you at least write a note? I wouldn't have minded if it was just a post it. What ever. At least it was something I could hold on to. Some prove of closure. But no, you just chose to leave me here, all by myself, drowning in desperation and loneliness. I have dated 4 or 5 men. I'm not going to lie to you. I suppose you have dated many women, too. They were ok, but really they weren't. Because none of them was you. I'm writing to you and I just realized I don't even have an address to send it to you. One would think that after all this time at least I would get an apologetic letter. But I didn't. I’ve thought about calling your parents, or your sister at least, and ask for you. But that only makes me sad, just to think I have to contact you through another person, when it used to be so easy, I usually didn't even have to call you, it was like we were connected and you’d know when I was looking for you, and we’d see each other right away. It was that easy. It was that simple. And now it just isn’t. And you just aren’t. It’s almost like you had it planned, its almost like you shook my hand and said “hey, I'm about to screw you over big time”, and what was I supposed to do? I was stuck in between you and a hard place, we wont talk about the hard place. But I don't blame you anymore there is too much pain to start with. Sometimes i feel like you left me half dead, inside my head. To be honest, looking back I see I'm not the girl I used to be. Its how you wanted it to be, its like you played a joke on me, and I lost a friend.. in the end. And I think that I’ve must have cried for days, and Im never going back .. to who I was.. And we will probably never go back to who we were. ...

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

lauren's retreat of the day

That day she came home to find herself exhausted. "Oh have I had a long day" she thought to herself. She went home to an empty house, an empty silence that matched with her empty soul and the horrible emptiness she felt inside. She didn't know what to do with herself anymore. She knew she was not content with her life right now. Had she stuggled through so much, for nothing at all? Life can sometimes be so odd, you do nothing at all and you could be the happiest person in the universe, but then in other occasions you do everything you have in your power and work for happiness, and even though you tried everything there is just no way to find it. Its a long way to happy, like Pink says in her new song. What the fuck, she thought as she entered the kitchen to cook dinner for one. She new she was lucky to be living in an era where microwave dinners are just as good as home made meals. She looked up her favorite lean cousin dinner plate? teriyaki chicken. And so she unwrapped the dinner, and desperately introduced it in the microwave, closed it, and pushed the DINNER MEAL button. There.. she didn't even have to think about how long it would take to cook the dinner, she now knew that in just 5 minutes she would be ready to eat her delicious meal She took a table cloth and put in the dinner table. Then, she looked for her favorite bottle of red wine and poured some in her fine crystal cup. She was hungry, but she new it was only a matter of seconds to eat. She ate what she thought of as a delight and then proceded to eat dessert, a perfectly baked flan she had in the fridge. She threw herself in the family room, even though she was the only member of that so called family. She might as well change the name to: Lauren's Recreational Room. She liked it more like that. Began to swap from channel to channel, not to her disbelief, nothing that she liked was on. So she went upstairs, undressed herself -slowly- and turned on her music in the bathroom where thee speakers gave birth to MoZella "say it aint so" and she turned the water on, just in the right hot temperature. She knew what came next: her retreat of the day: a hot, relaxing, bubble bath. She looked for her bathroom's goody drawer, and pulled out 4 vanilla canddles, her favorite vanilla bubbles, and her sponge. After 10 minutes of dripping water into the tub, she finally went in. Ohh, is this good- she thought as she indulged herself in the vanillla flavored bubble world she was submerged in. She tried not to think of anyone, or anything, other than her. This was her Lauren Alone time, and she liked it that way. She thought about her day, about work, about her life: her goals, her accomplishments and how it was all falling apart. Only one thought really comforted her: tomorrow will be another day.

Labels

Acing the GRE (2) adicción (1) amigas especiales (1) amistad (1) amor (6) anitadas (7) aprendizajes (10) AWARDS (3) Bandas (1) BLOG DAY (1) Boston (1) BP nominee 2010 (10) Broadway Musicals (1) cabrones (1) canciones (1) canta conmigo (1) Carrie quotes (1) cartas de desamor (2) checklist (1) Cine (20) Cine nacional (1) Conciertos (1) Confessions (1) Contigo pero sin tí (1) cortázar (1) Crónica (14) cronicas viajeras (3) cruceros (1) Cuento (27) cultura (1) cumpleaños (1) curiosidades (5) cursiladas (2) desahogo (1) despecho (6) Diario de un drogadicto (36) Discursos (1) Disney (1) Distancia (1) druken (1) En Drogas (1) En español (1) Ensayo (4) ensayo corto (1) Enterteinment (1) Escrito (2) Escrito Corto (18) Existencialist mood (1) farándula (1) ficción (66) Fiction (4) Film (6) Fotografía (11) frases (1) Halloween (1) heartbroken (1) hidden messages (1) Hollywood (6) idiotas (1) imágenes (1) In English (12) In Memoriam (4) Información (2) initials (1) Invierno (1) John Mayer (1) Lecturas (libros) (7) lenguaje gíglico (1) Let's sing it (2) letras (4) letters (1) literatura (1) lyrics (4) melancolia (1) montejo (1) Movies (3) Music Profiles (7) Musica (5) Música (9) NaNoWriMo (1) natalia (3) No - Ficción (85) no ficción (6) Noticias Nacionales (1) NYC (1) Oldies (1) olvido (3) Opinión (1) People (1) perfil (3) photography (2) pictures (1) playlists (1) Poema (3) poemas (3) Premio (3) qué más puedo decir? (1) Quotes (7) random (1) realidad (1) RECONOCIMIENTO (2) Recuerdos (2) recuerdos cercanos (1) Reflexión (15) Reggae (1) Reportaje (2) Reviews (3) Road to the Oscars 2010 (17) SAY (1) Shows (2) Stanford (1) sueños absurdos (1) Teatro (1) teconología (1) TOP 6 fotografías de la semana (9) trastornos mentales (1) Turismo (1) TV (1) USA (1) Venezuela (2) versos inversos (1) Viajes (2)
 
Real Time Analytics